Bringing National Expertise Home: What Southeast Michigan Learned About Family Philanthropy
Guest blog by: Randy Ross, Vice President, Donor Services, Community Foundation for Southeast Michigan
One of the most valuable roles a community foundation can play isn't writing check - it's bringing people together. At the Community Foundation for Southeast Michigan (CFSEM), we see ourselves as a convenor for our region's philanthropic ecosystem: donors, local nonprofit leaders, and the legal and financial advisors who guide families through major giving decisions. When we can pull those groups into the same room and add a nationally recognized expert to the conversation, the whole community benefits.
That's exactly what happened this June, when CFSEM partnered with the Planned Giving Roundtable of Southeast Michigan to host “Family Wealth: A Hard Look at the ‘Soft’ Issues” in Bloomfield Hills. Our guest speaker was Susan Schoenfeld, CEO and founder of Wealth Legacy Advisors LLC, who has spent her career helping wealthy families and the advisors who serve them navigate the parts of wealth that never show up on a balance sheet.
Nearly one hundred donors, advisors, and nonprofit partners spent the morning with Susan, and the conversation reinforced something we hear often in our work: the technical side of wealth planning - the trusts, the tax strategy, the legal structures - is rarely what keeps families up at night. It's the human questions that are hardest to answer. Here are five of the lessons that resonated most.
1. The hardest questions are human, not financial. Investment returns and tax efficiency matter, but they aren't usually what determines whether a family's wealth becomes a source of connection or a source of conflict across generations. The harder work is figuring out how to talk about money, purpose, and expectations within the family itself.
2. Silence doesn't protect anyone. Children today can look up a family's giving history, property value, or business dealings with a few clicks. Trying to shield kids from the reality of family wealth usually just leaves them unprepared for conversations they'll have anyway. Susan's advice: it's fine to say something is private for now, as long as the family follows through when the time comes to talk.
3. Earned income shapes character. Across the many families Susan has worked with, one pattern showed up again and again: kids who held real jobs outside the family business - and watched taxes come out of their own paychecks - developed a healthier relationship with money than those who didn't. For younger children, simple tools like a spend/save/give allowance system can plant the same seeds early.
4. Governance is about shared stories, not just shared documents. Wills, trusts, and foundation bylaws provide structure, but they don't answer the deeper question every family eventually faces: who are we, and what do we want the next generation to carry forward? Families who navigate wealth well tend to be the ones who've talked through their values - and who intentionally include spouses and in-laws in that conversation - long before a disagreement forces the issue.
5. Unexplained decisions cost more than unequal ones. Susan shared a personal story about a family estrangement that traced back not to an inheritance decision itself, but to the fact that it was never explained. Families that communicate the “why” behind a difficult choice - whether it involves an inheritance, a prenuptial agreement, or a philanthropic commitment - tend to preserve relationships that silence would have quietly destroyed.
Bringing a speaker like Susan Schoenfeld to Southeast Michigan is exactly the kind of convening CFSEM is built for. Our region is home to sophisticated donors, dedicated nonprofit leaders, and skilled professional advisors - but national experts don't always make it to our doorstep. By organizing events like this one, we can bring that expertise directly to the people doing the work of philanthropy here at home, and create space for donors, nonprofits, and advisors to learn from one another in the same room.
This is only one example of the kind of programming we regularly bring to the community. We'd love for you to be part of the next one.
Stay connected:
Follow our philanthropy blog at cfsem.org/philanthropy for ongoing insights on family giving, planned giving, and philanthropic strategy.
Watch for invitations to future CFSEM events featuring national experts on topics that matter to donors, nonprofits, and advisors across the region.
Have questions about family philanthropy, or want to talk through your own giving goals? Reach out to our Donor Services team at DonorServices@cfsem.org - we'd love to connect.